On Michael Jackson's Death: An Important Overlooked Aspect of His Life

I haven't written in forever, sorry about that loyal readers. So it may seem a little odd that the current events topic that pulls me out of my blog-sabbatical is the death of pop-icon Michael Jackson. The reason I write this post though is to discuss something that seems to have been overlooked in the non-stop media craze since Mr. Jackson died on Friday afternoon, June 26th.

But before I go there, let me say this: Michael Jackson absolutely was in a lot of ways, a Jackie Robinson type figure for pop/R&B music. I mean I remember being a small child when Jackson was hitting his stride with Thriller and whatnot, he was everywhere. I was into like the Beach Boys and REM a little bit but here was this R&B style singer who everyone liked. I mean Michael Jackson in the 80's was like apple pie and the Yankees. I didn't think of him as a black music performer, he was just Micheal Jackson, incredible dancer/singer/performer. MTV played the hell out of the Thriller video, (still the number one album of all-time) and the color of Jackson's skin was irrelevant to everyone around the world (except himself) who adored his music.

Okay the obvious being said, let me get back to my original point. I saw a documentary once on Mr. Jackson, (this wasn't a tell-all media craze Entertainment Tonight thing, it was a serious look at his life from interviews from the people close to him that really knew him - not hangers-on/exploiters like Donald Trump or whoever). The underlying theme that kept reappearing in all of these interviews, was that it was obvious during Jackson's adolescence, that he was fairly effeminate and maybe enjoyed the company of boys better than girls, i.e. - he was gay. But his dad of course, who Jackson said beat him, would never let his son come out of the closet and be openly gay. I don't think there was even any slight rational outlet for him to explore this part of himself.

Of course there is nothing wrong with being gay, and that's the point of this post. This kind of oppressive stay in the closet mentality is just that - oppressive, and it breeds negative emotions and stunted growth for the self. A lot of this is conjecture I know, but a lot of it's not, you can see it for yourself looking at the man's life. I mean look what he was reaching for with his 'ideal' self (the skin issue aside even) it was a very effeminate female with long luxurious hair. There was nothing remotely masculine about him at this time and until he died. Michael Jackson in the 90's and 2000's looked and acted much more like a female than a male.

I myself am not gay so I am not gonna sit here on some soap box and preach about how people shouldn't hide their true selves, because I have no idea what that kind of intense, trapped feeling might be like. I just wanted to point out something that's seeming to be overlooked in the wake of his death. I think it's important that this aspect of his life not get overlooked, if only for the sake of anyone out there who might be experiencing the same kind of scared to let their family know who they truly are mentality.

Science Fiction Notes and Thought Creates Reality

One thing I readily admit is that I am a bit of a science fiction nerd. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't say I am an avid science fiction fan, but the general concepts of the genre do fascinate me. One thing I like about it is the way some sci-fi authors (or writers in general) really nail what could (and does) happen in the near future. Or the way a good writer can express ideas about our current and possible cultures, using a fictional story to give us unique perspective.

It's books like Aldous Huxley's Brave New World, which can paint an almost too real future, that really gets me thinking. The society depicted in it can easily be linked with elements of modern societies; - the government influenced homogeneous conformism, bio-engineering technology, the synthetically created 'soma' drug that depresses free-thinking, all issues today in one way or another. Take for example biotechnology and cloned animals; the other day I read about scientists cloning a Pyrenean ibex, a mountain goat that was deemed extinct in 2000. Using saved samples of the animal scientists successfully cloned one, (that died shortly after birth from a defect which raises some ethical issues obviously). As the technology progresses daily so do the questions on multiple levels (morally, ethically, philosophically, etc.) surrounding things like stem cell's, genetic engineering, pharmaceuticals, government controlled media etc.

Another one of my favorite sci-fi books is Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card, and one thing from it that struck me is the way author Orson Scott Card alludes to the oncoming power of the internet. There's that story arc in the novel where Ender's brother and sister use what they call 'the nets' (a kind of computer network for intellectuals) to insert and assert their political opinion into the mainstream media; using 'the nets' anonymity so as not be revealed as kids. The following passage from the book is between Ender's brother Peter and sister Val (all of whom are genius-children), "Peter, you're twelve."
"Not on the nets I'm not, On the nets I can name myself anything I want, and so can you."

Keep in mind this was written in 1985 (in the acknowledgments Card mentions elements of the story were first published in August 1977, the month and year I was born incidentally, also the month and year when Elvis died). But that's totally what the internet has become in a sense, an instantaeous worlwide information center, with the power to manipulate it in the hands of anyone with a keyboard.

A short synopsis of what good science fiction is, can be taken from the introduction to Ender's Game. Card explains that his inspiration for the book had partly come from reading Isaac Asimov's Foundation trilogy, which set him to thinking (as all good science fiction should do), "What would the future be like? How would things change? What would remain the same?" And then he goes on to say, "In science fiction, however, the whole point is that the ideas are fresh and startling and intriguing; you imitate the great ones, not by rewriting their stories, but rather by creating stories that are just as startling and new. "

(sample from Atmospheric Dust by Ed T. )

"Physical concepts are free creations of the human mind, and are not, however it may seem, uniquely determined by the external world." -Albert Einstein

Anyways, the thing that started the idea for this post happened when I caught one of my favorite episodes of Star Trek the Next Generation on TV the other day. (I refuse to enter a debate on which Star Trek show was the best, because it's clearly STNG.) It's the episode - "Where No One Has Gone Before" from 1987, in which the Enterprise crew encounters the mysterious "traveler" who accidentally teleports them and their ship millions of lightyears away. When Captain Picard is questioning the traveler as to how the ship got millions of lightyears from where it was, he asks him "What got us here?", the traveller replies "Thought" and then goes on to say, "Thought is the basis of all reality, the energy of thought, to put it in your terms, is very powerful."

I think this idea is true not only in an abstract sense, (positive thinking and visualizing can help one achieve goals, heal the body, you are what you think about, etc.) but in a very physical direct way also; thoughts are real and determine our reality in a myriad of different ways. From defining our universe in a metaphysical math equation or exploring the 'realness' of some sensations or events in dreams, thoughts play a vital role in understanding ourselves and the universe.

Digital Lumia Art By George Stadnik

I originally had a blurb about artist George Stadnik at the end of a recent post, but he was kind enough to provide me with a picture of one of his works, so I thought this deserved it's own post. If you haven't checked out my post on light shaped to create art, check out this post: Thomas Wilfred's Lumia, and George Stadnik's website is: The Art of Lumia.

Image © by George Stadnik, all rights reserved

This is a still-shot from the new Digital Lumia DVD release - "Three Times Three". The image is from the first 30 seconds of the piece, which is a series of three movements, each 6 minutes long. Mr. Stadnik says the inspiration for this composition comes from, 'Monet's studies of light and shadow at different times of the day at Rouen Catherdral.' His website cited above has various pages with more work to view and background information on the more classic Wilfred version of Lumia, as well as the digital work described here.

In addition to DVD ordering info, you can find a 4mb clip from the movie "Flame" on the Digital Lumia page. Definitely check it out it's not only light-bending, it's mind-bending. You might have seen some of those screensavers/visuals that correspond to the music you play in your digital music player... well this is like that but with like a million times better resolution, design, and texture with a much more organic feel. You have to see it to believe it. A big thanks goes out to Mr. Stadnik for sharing his work with us.

The Wisdom of Cesar Milan and Ode to My Brush

I was watching the Dog Whisperer on the National Geographic channel the other day. It was an episode in which Cesar Milan was working with a dog that had a habit of running scared when hearing any loud noise and then getting somewhat aggressive when you try and bring it out of the corner of the yard. So he was using a pool skimmer that he found nearby to stroke the dog with. He did this in order to keep his hands away from the dog and still show it calm energy, he exhibited a calm state of mind while gently stroking the dog's back with the skimmer, and he said, "It's not the tool, it's the energy behind the tool." I was struck by the profound simpleness of the statement, and it immediately made me think of a brush and painting, it's not the brush it's the energy behind the brush (or pen or whatever).

"The painting rises from the brushstrokes as a poem rises from the words. The meaning comes later." - Joan Miro

Sometimes maybe it is the brush though; for example recently I had misplaced my favorite watercolor brush and really was in a painting mood, so proceeded to dig through all my other brushes and start paint anyways. After an hour or two with a few different brushes I was dismayed with my results and decided to stop working. Later I found my favorite brush (a Grumbacher golden edge #4620 size 7 I've had for years) and the urge to paint returned and I was much happier with the results. I probably have close to a thousand hours of painting logged with this single brush; It's my Excalibur if you will, or my old reliable. (True story, as a small child once, I was intent on changing my name, after much deliberation I had decided on Arthur for some reason, obviously I didn't really change my name though).

"Arthur withdraws the sword"
Illustration by Helen Stratton from Heroic Legends
by Agnes Grozier Herbertson, London, 1908.

The original point of the post though, is that like Cesar transferring his energy through the tool into the dog, the artist transfers his or her energy through the brush/pencil/pen onto and into the paper/canvas. The tool is merely an extension of the hand. I discussed this topic to an extent in the post Chi, Energy, and Painting. There is a work by artist Alex Grey called Artist Hand that really illustrates this idea well. To view it, go to the Alex Grey Website in the left hand column under Paintings, then under Progress of the Soul to view it.

Sometimes when I am using a brush or pen, this metaphor comes to mind of it being a kind of seismograph that reads the energy in the room and in me; but one that has unlimited color and shape options and my arm as a guide. I love digital art and of course computers are wonderful tools, blah blah blah; but there is an inherent, undefinable, unquestionable quality that a handmade thing has over a digital or machine-made thing. This is one reason that I will always prefer a hand-made work of art over a digital one.

I Somewhat Enjoy the Winter Blahs

I haven't written anything for a while, and I am blaming it on the winter blahs. Really though, I kind of like winter; I like using it has an excuse to stay inside and paint, watch movies, and drink lots of coffee. I do those things all the time even when it's nice outside, but at least when it's winter I have an excuse. Also, battling the snow, ice, sleet, and nosehair-freezing cold can be interesting at least. Stepping outside into the empty white crystallized frozen death of winter; it's daunting and beautiful at the same time.

Red and Blue Design by Ed T. ©

I always thought to myself that I would not like to live somewhere where there isn't winter, but I think I am changing my mind. Maybe I could do without a few months of freezing weather every year. It sounds so cliche and I hate that, but as I get older winter seems to take more of a toll on me. Well anyways, I haven't been writing much but I have been somewhat productive on the painting end, doing several small watercolors that will actually be framed and for sale in the near future hopefully. Although I have sold a couple paintings and prints and have had offers for some of my work, this is the first time I will actually formally be offering original paintings for sale. Above is one of those paintings I have been working on over the past few weeks.

Dear Santa: I Want My Own Workshop

I mentioned in my Thanksgiving post about rededicating myself to finishing projects and creating more every day (really though, that's always somewhere in my mind). So today I am imagining what a gift from St. Nick could do for me. Pretty selfish thing to think about on Christmas I suppose, but hey I am still a kid at heart, I can dream can't I? Okay, here is some thought for others, to donate to the human rights charity Amnesty International, click here.)

My wish from Santa? A wide open, well organized studio/workshop space complete with everything from a wide range of art supplies, to printing and framing equipment. I imagine what I could do with some space, some equipment and some supplies; for one - layout all my unfinished, large, unstretched paintings on canvas ( I'm guessing there is about 25 - 30), and varnish and stretch them. Just to be able to lay out all my unfinished work in a wide space would be great, I would turn it into a painting factory. I could frame my multitude of sketches, watercolors, ink drawings, and prints (I am guessing roughly 40+ of those). With an ample supply of time, space, and money I could have 50 - 60 pieces complete in a matter of weeks.

What I have now is a cramped room to basically store all my work and supplies in with a tiny little space to paint, (which is a lot for me actually, so I'm not complaining just dreaming. I definitely appreciate what I have and it's a lot, see the Thanksgiving post.) When I was younger I didn't quite understand why artists seemed to prefer studios away from their homes, but now I do. It would be nice to have a separate studio, the number one reason being obviously that you're less likely to slack off when it's just you and the work and the supplies, and not all the luxuries (distractions) and comforts that a home usually provides. When it's just you in a room with supplies and maybe a radio (or an ipod I guess) and no one else? that's a completely different story, or maybe it's just that I'm not disciplined, but like I said, in my experience, a lot of artists prefer the studio separate from their living space.

Well that's my selfish Christmas wish-imagining for today, right now I am off to finish buying presents for other people believe it or not, so Merry Christmas!

Image above is © by Ed T. and is a derivative work of a Thomas Nast drawing published in 1881

Discussing Julian Schnabel

In the last post I asked the question (in relation to working full time at only your art) - "...but where do you draw the line? At what point do you just go for it fully and how exactly do you do that?" On Sunday's edition of CBS's 60 Minutes there was an interview with modern artist Julian Schnabel, that at least provides his answer - "I stopped working has a cook when I got $6000 for a painting." (Aside from working other odd jobs before that too). The first thing he was noted for or got noticed for (as you can see in the interview below) was smashing plates he bought from thrift stores, then painting and gluing them to canvas in mosaic fashion.


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I have a lot of interest in Schnabel's work, I may not like all of it, but I find it very interesting. In addition to coming up in the art scene in the 1980's He has also been directing movies for a while now. He directed the movie Basquiat, which is undoubtedly one of my favorite movies of all time (along with Edward Scissorhands, and Dead Man directed by Tim Burton and Jim Jarmusch, respectively). But I don't think there has been a movie that depicts a place and time quite as perfectly as Schnabel does with the 1980's New York Art scene in Basquiat. (At least in comparison to what I can tell from pictures, interviews, literature, and the art made during that time).

Looking at the history of modern art specifically, Schnabel is at the center of the last two decades of the 2oth century and is still a huge influence. At least I would have to include his work at the top of my list of interests and influences on my work, if for no other reason than he does make you think. Say what you want about his work, but one thing you can't say is that it doesn't make you think, for even in the ways that you dislike it, your brain is churning on exactly the reasons why. It pushes thinking and new perspective, which is what the definition of good art is to me.

Watching the interview, I wanted to criticize the man but ended up only being intrigued and wanting to paint; to create art if for nothing else than to prove the man wrong in some way, but now that sounds silly doesn't it? I guess I like the way he thinks about things in an entirely different way than a lot of people, of course a lot of his work will be stuff that doesn't work for me, but there is undoubtedly a lot that is very interesting, for a lot of different reasons.

Also I relate to his story, I also have been an drawing and creating since I was a child, and I also had much older siblings and spent a lot of time alone. In one part of the interview he expressed that and also said, "I really wasn't going to be anything else" (other than an artist). It sounds cliche maybe but I relate to that directly. Not as an excuse not to pursue a different path but because it's always felt right. Like when you get a monkey off your back; solve a problem, defeat a fear, that feeling of well-being you get afterwords, that's what pursuing art has always been for me. So I guess my question is: when will I get my first $6000 for a painting?